As we approach the end of the year, many of us find ourselves in the same position as years past. We consider where we went off track or perhaps we recall goals we failed to accomplish. Maybe we wanted to quit smoking, move up at work, lose weight, spend more time with our spouse or kids, budget our money better, get out of debt, finally get to the gym or maybe even take that trip we have dreamed about. So what do most of us do? We promise ourselves that January 1st, we will finally do it. We assure ourselves that we will in fact make huge, sweeping changes—just a month or two from now.
Does it work? For most of us the answer is no. Without a real commitment and at least a basic plan, it is simply too tough to make real changes to ingrained behavior patterns. The reality is that it is challenging to make changes to familiar patterns of action, especially the ones that serve to alleviate or mask stress like smoking, overeating, overspending and procrastination. And big, sweeping proclamations of “I will always” or “I will never” simply don’t set us up for success. Neither does picking some arbitrary date in the future.
So what’s the solution? Well, if it were readily apparent or easy, we would all be fit, rich, non-smoking, perfect parents, partners and world travellers. The best answer is pick something small but meaningful that you can do today and then do it. For example, if you are in debt or concerned about your spending, decide today that you will put yourself on a debt diet for the next week. So no lunches out, expensive coffees or any other unnecessary purchases for one week starting now. This can even include forgoing the grocery store for the week and finding a way to use up what’s in your pantry. It could mean going home and having a peanut butter sandwich when all you want to do is pick up dinner somewhere. And don’t start tomorrow, start right now. Will this one week erase a year of over doing it? No, but it will get you in the mindset to make positive changes, it will remind you that the sacrifices you need to make to get where you want are doable and at the end of the week, you’ll have more money in your pocket than you would have.
Small, immediate changes will get you to your goals far more reliably than huge, sweeping changes. Like most 12-step programs maintain, take it one day at a time and start today. Want to quit smoking? Commit to smoking half of what you would normally for the week and investigate smoking cessation support like the patch to help you transition. Want to go travel somewhere but never seem to make it happen? Decide today you will estimate the basic costs and that tomorrow you will determine if you can afford it and the following day how much vacation time you might need. Want to spend more time with your kids? Commit to just fifteen minutes of interaction tonight where your kids have your undivided attention. Now do just this much for the next week. Want to move up at work? Ask your supervisor for more responsibility right now. Tell someone in your organization who can help you that you want to do more, be more and earn more and you would like to know what you need to do to get there. Then do it.
Momentum, or the building force of something that is moving, is a wonderful thing when it comes to changing our behavior patterns. Small victories lead to bigger ones and will help you build the confidence to overcome personal challenges and achieve your goals. Like a stream cutting a new path, a small trickle over time creates a groove until the water naturally flows in that path.
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