What You Say & How You Say It

In Buddhism, it’s called right speech. The idea of right speech can be explained as, "It is spoken at the right time. It is spoken in truth. It is spoken affectionately. It is spoken beneficially. It is spoken with a mind of good-will." The Bible also offers several references to the same ideas of carefully considering one’s speech. And I’m guessing your mother likely told you at least once, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” So does any of this advice relate to the leaders, bosses and managers of the world?

Of course. In fact, the best leaders understand and accept that their words can meaningfully and powerfully impact their teams and their organization in a number of significant ways, like:

• Fostering open communication
• Communicating their vision
• Employee engagement
• Employee satisfaction
• Employee retention and turnover
• Employee motivation

And that’s just naming a few! With so many balls in the air at any given moment, what you say and how you say it might not always be at the front of your mind. Yet, your words, messages and manner of delivering them really deserve your attention. Your body language, tone of voice and even your facial expressions can impact your team and even at times, send the wrong message.

With thoughtful words and an intention to hit the important hallmarks of good communication, you can inspire your team, build trust, further develop relationships that are good for everyone, manage conflict when it arises and effectively share your vision. And as a leader, these are the things that you simply cannot delegate, much of it must come directly from you. 

What kind of things do employees really want and need to hear? They want:

• Praise & recognition
• You to check in once in awhile
• Your support
• Your positivity
• Your courtesy
• You to value their input
• Your feedback
• Your help identifying obstacles
• Your interest
• Openness to their ideas & suggestions
• Your responsibility when something goes wrong
• Your encouragement
• Appreciation
• A connection with you
• To understand your expectations

So, as I myself do often, I encourage you to pay attention to how you speak to your team and about whether or not you are sending the message you intend.