Sometimes life can feel like you’re caught up in a really bad country western song. Maybe you been done wrong, your dog died, the rent is overdue and the wheels fell off you truck? There are times in all of our lives where we can start to feel like we are walking around with a big bull’s eye on our back and the universe is playing one cruel trick after another on us.
Anyone can be happy when life is good. It’s easy to have an ‘attitude of gratitude’ when everything is going your way, but much, much harder when it feels like the deck is stacked against you. Yet, it’s exactly times like these where trying to be grateful for what you do have is so important to contentment. So how do you cultivate happiness and gratitude when it feels like life is throwing you challenge after challenge?
1.Write Out a Gratitude List
Do you know your brain cannot multitask very well? Call it counting your blessings or remembering the positives, but actually writing out what you are grateful for can force your brain to stop fixating on your problems. Also, many of the things we should be thankful for get forgotten because we are simply so used to having them. Be thankful for friends who care, legs that work, a good warm meal because there are far too many people that go without.
2.Ask For Help
Many of us act like turtles when life gets rough. We retreat into our shells and try to wait it out, but what if there’s a better way. No one wants to be the person always complaining, but sometimes another person just listening and maybe even offering a few kind words is all it takes to feel better. Likewise, sometimes someone else is in a mindset where they might see a solution to a problem that we did not. Like we have learned from Ubuntu, we are all connected, we are designed to be social and interdependent—as humans, we just aren’t designed for solitary life.
3.Try Not to Compare
It’s a natural human tendency to compare ourselves with others, and we often tend to automatically see others as better off. It can be all too easy when you are in a rut to look around and think everyone else has it better. And yet, no one is without problems and no one is free from pain. In fact, I would bet that many of the people who seem to ‘have it all ‘are less happy than most of us. I often say that although I wish I didn’t have the problems I have, I’ll take my problems over anyone else’s most days. Your life is what it is, the good parts and the bad and unless you walk in someone’s shoes, you really just don’t know how easy their life is just because it may look easy from the outside.
4.Be Nice to Yourself
Do things that genuinely make you feel happy. That doesn’t mean play video games for hours, shop with money you don’t have or medicate bad feelings with food or alcohol. These kinds of things mask negative feelings rather than create good ones and are likely to add to your problems long term. Think of things that are beneficial or at the very least not destructive. Read a book, take a bath, have dinner with your spouse or friends, play with your kids, take a walk or maybe listen to whatever music it is that makes you feel good.
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